The Virtuous Heart: On Listening to the Voice of Inner Goodness

It’s Okay to Not be Okay. But it’s Also Okay to be Okay.

Historically, psychology’s emphasis has been directed toward the maladies of the human mind. The ‘disease’ model presents dysfunctions of the mind in the same way medical science did for afflictions of the body. Psychological science has, of course, advanced research and treatment for mental disorders. Many of us no longer attribute afflictions of our thoughts to supernatural forces. Members of the general public are becoming increasingly aware of, and more open to seeking professional help for their mental health, thanks in part to awareness campaigns that have led to positive changes, reducing stigmatization, and increasing help-seeking behaviours [1]. Awareness campaigns can also, however, lead individuals to ‘over-interpret’ their own symptoms; misleading information about one’s ‘symptoms’ can unintentionally elevate anxiety [2]. This ‘prevalence inflation’ effect – that awareness efforts are causing increased reports of mental health problems is a paradoxical effect caused by increased mental health literacy [3]. But it does offer food for thought – more so given new evidence of people now self-diagnosing their mental health conditions using Artificial Intelligence (AI) [4], or through social media [5]. In an increasingly digitalized world, we appear to be self-diagnosing, if not self-medicating ourselves, through technology.

Increased awareness of mental health disorders has even led to another unintended effect – the romanticization of mental health. Social media users exposed to these mental health messages may end up glamourizing mental illness, seeing it as a status symbol – an effect that is particularly evident among the Gen Z demographic [6]. According to the authors of an editorial in the journal Cureus, while it is “okay to not be okay,” users also need to be aware that it is also, well, okay to be okay. The romanticization of mental health issues hints at a deeper underlying need among today’s society – a need to be deeply seen, to be recognized, to know that one’s experiences are unique, both to oneself, but perhaps more so, in the eyes of others. Mental health literacy efforts should, of course, be advocated, but they can be complemented with a language or terminology that speaks to what is already working well within the individual. For the past 30 years, that new language has been the language of character strengths.

The Virtues of Simply Being

Ask yourself, “What’s wrong with me?” and you probably will have little difficulty listing adjectives, qualities, attributes, or even mental health disorders in your response. Ask yourself, “What’s right with me?” and you might need to pause before responding. Character strengths speak to what’s already right within each individual. These are aspects of your personality that produce positive outcomes for yourself and those around you [7]. What is right and working well within you isn’t a talent, skill, or ability – it is a facet of your personality. This definition and lexicon of strengths, called the Values in Action (VIA) typology, groups strengths into six virtue categories: (i) mind, (ii) will, (iii) heart, (iv) community, (v) restraint, and (v) spirit. The six virtue categories comprise 24 unique strengths, from leadership and love of learning, self-regulation and spirituality, honesty and hope, to perseverance and prudence. Strengths research over the past 20 years has shown that we have all 24 of these strengths. Perhaps more important is the fact that these virtues have been recognized by researchers and scholars across history, culture, and society. The language of strengths and virtues, then, has a longer history than the language of mental illness. When we use our strengths in our lives regularly and in various ways, we enjoy greater life satisfaction [8], while also safeguarding ourselves against mental health disorders [9]. You can find out your character strengths in rank-order – i.e., which tend to be the most prominent part of your personality by completing a free survey here: https://www.viacharacter.org/

Learning a New Language

Character strengths have been part of my journey and one of the most important tools I use, both for my work and personal development. I recall, a decade ago, having come across the VIA typology of strengths when researching ideas for new lesson activities for a course on the psychology of emotions. One of the lectures was on happiness and positive emotions. The language of strengths helped me ground my understanding of authentic happiness. Setting aside time for students in the class to complete the VIA survey, I found that many students were keen to personally share stories of how they recognized and used their strengths.

Often, we go through our interactions, narrowing our focus on things we don’t like about the other, get upset by something the other person has said, or just jump to conclusions that some people are just ‘impossible’ to be with. We may also direct that criticism inward. We condemn ourselves for being too ‘sensitive,’ assuming every less-than-optimal interaction is a symptom of social anxiety, or that we do not have the capacity to cope with life. The labels we use to describe others, and the labels we use to describe ourselves, are heavily shaded by our inner monologue. Our inner voice is not the most assuring or validating. We say things about ourselves that we would never think of saying to our friends. It has been said by philosophers that the limits of one’s language are the limits of one’s world. If true, then the language of deficits and defects limits our pathways for well-being and flourishing.

The beauty of the language of strengths is simply that it encourages us – trains us, even, to see the good in ourselves and in others. To know that deep within each of us, there are facets of goodness. And from those facets, opportunities for individuals to do good for themselves and those around them. This is by no means a call to ignore or excuse harmful actions, but in the language of strengths, it means that unhelpful or undesirable behaviours are the result of an under- or overusing our strengths [10]. Inconsiderate words and actions are the result of underusing our love and kindness. Unreasonably demanding requests and foolhardiness are probably the result of an overuse of leadership and bravery. Entitlement and absence of accountability, a deficit of humility and gratitude. Rather than inflict ourselves with labels of what’s wrong, the language of strengths moves us to consider what’s right, encouraging us to use the best of who we already are to address behaviours that are limiting opportunities for well-being.

Dr. Ryan Niemiec, Chief Science and Education Officer from the VIA Institute on Character, shared an idea on how we might tune in to the voice of our strengths. The next time you find yourself experiencing a challenging situation, try balancing your descriptors and interpretations with the language of strengths. Your strengths, like your inner critic and condemner, have voices too – voices that unfortunately get drowned out since we are much more accustomed to listening to negatives, to illness, to flaws. Dr. Niemiec introduced me to the idea of ‘polyvocality’ – i.e., many voices. If you listened carefully enough, you may be able to hear not just your inner critic, but also the voice of your strengths. Here are examples of how I’ve put this into practice in my daily life:

• Anxiety says, “There is no way you will get your work done by the deadline.”

• Perseverance responds, “The client’s last-minute request for a change in the proposal is unreasonable, but you have dealt with a similar demand in the past. There is a way to plan this task so that you can return the proposal just in time.”

• Catastrophe screams, “You’re late to work again. And you forgot your best friend’s birthday – no wonder you keep losing friends.”

• Kindness replies, “You’ve had a challenging week attending to your children’s troubles in school. Your friend will not only understand but will likely empathize with you – she always has.”

• Insecurities remind you, “Write a book about positive psychology? Qualified experts could write a better book in their sleep than you could slaving away at your desk for the next two years.”

• Bravery whispers: “Still, no harm in trying.”

What is your inner goodness saying, or even simply whispering to you in times of challenge or strife?

Life is short – the fruit of this life is a good character and acts for the common good.

Marcus Aurelius\

References

[1] Tam, M. T., Wu, J. M., Zhang, C. C., Pawliuk, C., & Robillard, J. M. (2024). A systematic review of the impacts of media mental health awareness campaigns on young people. Health Promotion Practice, 25(5), 907-920. https://doi.org/10.1177/15248399241232646

[2] Foulkes, L., & Andrews, J. L. (2023). Are mental health awareness efforts contributing to the rise in reported mental health problems? A call to test the prevalence inflation hypothesis. New Ideas in Psychology, 69, 101010. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.newideapsych.2023.101010

[3] Foulkes, L., Winterburn, I., Sandra, D., Inzlicht, M., Andrews, J. L., & Guzman Holst, C. (2026). The psychological consequences of mental health awareness efforts. Nature Reviews Psychology, 1-12. https://doi.org/10.1038/s44159-026-00532-7

[4] Wimbarti, S., Kairupan, B. R., & Tallei, T. E. (2024). Critical review of self‐diagnosis of mental health conditions using artificial intelligence. International Journal of Mental Health Nursing, 33(2), 344-358. https://doi.org/10.1111/inm.13303

[5] Yıldırım, S. (2023). The Challenge of Self-diagnosis on Mental Health Through Social Media: A Qualitative Study. In: Battineni, G., Mittal, M., Chintalapudi, N. (eds) Computational Methods in Psychiatry. Springer, Singapore. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-981-99-6637-0_10

[6] Ahuja, J., & Fichadia, P. A. (2024). Concerns regarding the glorification of mental illness on social media. Cureus, 16(3), e56631. https://www.doi.org/10.7759/cureus.56631

[7] Niemiec, R.M. (2018). Character strengths interventions: A field guide for practitioners. Hogrefe.

[8] Schutte, N. S., & Malouff, J. M. (2019). The impact of signature character strengths interventions: A meta-analysis. Journal of Happiness Studies, 20(4), 1179-1196. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10902-018-9990-2

[9] Casali, N., & Feraco, T. (2025). Bridges over troubled water: A meta-analysis of the associations of character strengths with well-being and common mental health disorders. European Journal of Personality, 39(6), 878-896. https://doi.org/10.1177/08902070251366

[10] Niemiec, R. M. (2023). Finding the golden mean: The overuse, underuse, and optimal use of character strengths. In A second-wave positive psychology in counselling psychology (pp. 183-201). Routledge.

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